Gods love

God’s love

I seem to be running into a million different examples and illustrations of How God actually loves us. This line started several weeks back. I had figured out a way to accurately describe a person’s actions by graphing them on a grid... I know – nerdy – but give me a chance.

We can all plot on a linear graph, how happy or sad a person’s actions make us feel. The two extremes could include whether they make you feel peaceful or not, or comfortable or not, or angry or not... any polar opposite emotional responses you can come up with can be placed on either side of this sliding scale.

Now, crossing this sliding scale is a non emotion based evaluation of whether that action is functional.... or dysfunctional. The idea is to realize that whether or not an action of another person makes you happy or sad is not a measure of whether their activity is functional or dysfunctional.

You may be enabling dysfunctional activity because it makes you happy or content. You may also be upset of saddened by activity that is intelligent and well thought out and good for that person.

Okay, I am going to try to write a book about this... due out in two, three or five years.....

When I began to plot how I was reacting to people and whether what I was responding to was a functional or dysfunctional action, I began to ask the inevitable question, how should I respond?

The answer I got was from someone who was praying. They were praying about God’s unfailing love. I opened my eyes and realized that it was my responsibility to respond to every one of someone’s actions as God responds to my actions... with Unfailing love.

What an impossible task! So I wanted a way to plot how much love I was showing to the person. I envisioned a blanket of love over the spectrum of traits and actions that a person exhibits. I realized that God’s blanket of love extends over the entire spectrum of their actions. My blanket of love barely crept over the demarcation point between happy and sad.

What a sad commentary on my human state.

I realize that in order to learn how I should respond to people who’s traits and actions upset me or endanger me. How has God responded? How then should I respond?

Since that time, I have had example after example placed in my path that exhibits the deep and encompassing love of God.

I will write much more on this subject

Holding on

Holding on.

I am bound to be repeating myself. But like layers of an onion, I must go back over areas that I am weak in – in order to effectively deal with them. I cannot expect to deal effectively with a systemic dysfunctional issue without going over it again and again and again. So today, I am remembering again to let go.....

What am I holding on too? The people, the losses, the loves, the hurts, the possessions... I hold onto them as though they were mine. But truly, nothing is mine. There is nothing that I can possess. Those things I hold on to will either be ripped away, or become a poison in my life.

It is like the giant that wants to hug-them and squeeze them and hold them tight... but by grasping them, he kills them...

It is hard to see things as temporary – Especially the good things – But also the bad. It is as though we bought the lie so that we could believe the good things would never leave us. But it also makes us believe that the bad will never go either.

Lord, make my thoughts sober and Help me to let go of everything, trusting that you will provide, in your time, and in your way.

I don't know

I simply do not know what to say today.... But I will give it a try.

With all of my discoveries about life and myself, none of them softens the deep affection I have for that certain person. Admittedly, the shape and form of it has changed dramatically. How I relate to her has drastically changed. I no longer dare to hope for a future with her at my side, but I do still look at her and see everything that I loved and treasured.

I had a moment, these past few days, when I remembered again how I expressed how deep my decision was to date her. I warned her that as hard as it had been for her to get me to see her that way, that would be that much harder for me if things didn't work out. I know how deeply I love. I never wanted to do it again, unless I knew that they were the ONE..

Well, That just goes to show what a good prognosticator I am :(.

I know God is using this to do something special in me. I am beyond thankful. As my life changes, it becomes the easier it is to Love her from this safe distance. It reminds me of a biblical author who talked about something that he continued to pray to God about, but God never resolved it. He said that it had to remain in his life to keep him humble and remind him of his dependence upon God.

Well, I cannot imagine a better gift from God, than for her to be what continually forces me to seek His face and His will in my life.

What is Lord of your Heart

What is Lord of your Heart?

Not in word, but in practice...

You can see it by your fruit...

Are you always a peacemaker, harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted and humble in the midst of being despitefully used when in a defendable and justifiable position?

Or do you hit back. (Insult for insult, slight for slight)

You know, it is okay if you do. Just don’t fool yourself (as I have been) by thinking that you have fully given your life to God.  

I hope to one day be able to say that I will not allow a woman to rule my heart. That in it’s place, I hope to be continually looking to the unquenchable source for my hopes and dreams.... And I will know if I am by my fruit... (less-needy = more-lovable)

Question what you believe

Yes, Question it. It is healthy!

We all say things in our heads... all day long. And because we are the ones saying it, we conclude that what we are saying is what we believe. Well here is a challange: Question what you believe. Pretend it contains only a piece of the truth. Just enough for us to accept it. BE BRUTAL. Search for the other perspectives.

Please, Don't just believe what you tell youself.

Check out this article I found - it reminded me that most of the emotional pain I experience is because of what I am believing inside. SOME, if not MOST, is not completely accurate. All of it deserves to be observed from a different perspective.

PURSUE TRUTH - even in the darkest parts of your own mind....

"Truth is always kinder than our thoughts about it" and The truth will set us free.

Storm

Sometimes a storm brews. You want it to stop. But it doesn't.. So you try to fix it. But the fix does more damage than the storm itself.

Let us see the storm as the next lesson. Be patient within it. Don't panic. Don't manipulate it. Let it rain. And look for that quiet small voice. You will know it when you hear it. It will be the one that tells you what you don't quite want to hear. Just be quiet and absorb it.

It just might be God teaching you something. 

OffTopic - FireFox

I have to say, The very best thing I have on my computer is the Internet browser FireFox. I know, this is a departure from what I normally write about, but it it adds so much to my experience on the internet.... It is just amazing.

If you are still using Internet Explorer - or any other internet browser.... well, a few minutes getting used to FireFox
  and you will understand what I am talking about. Right now, I am using the FTP extention to add files to Adam's Web site, Plus I am writting this blog entry, and I have 5 other pages that I am motitoring..... and I have only one Window open. It is fantastic! Plus, I don't get pop-up adds and spywear - as you do with Microsoft's Internet Explorer...

There are so many reasons why FireFox is great - Thank you Kate for Introducing this to me!!! (almost a year ago now!)

IDOLizing the Ideal

IDOLizing the Ideal

Talk about a thought that is germinating. These thoughts are completely open for discussion. I could be completely off base. But I think there is a measure of truth here. I hope you find it :P  Please comment!!

• We often idolize the Ideal.


• An Idol is something we fashion, create, or buy. We might be creating an image that we think will comfort, direct, or empower us.


• A Metaphysical Idol (Coined Term) is an idealized image we create in our mind.


• There are all sorts of things we apply our imaging too: Ourselves, Other People (parents/kids, friends, leaders.........), The Future, Our Possessions (There must be more!)


• We often expect these idols to remain unblemished and have God-like knowledge of our motivations, goals, intentions, and/or silent prayers.


• When the Image (or Idol) that we have does not perform as we as imagined, we are left angry, upset, disappointed and hurt.

When that image is attached to a person, that person will inevitably let us down.  We then often say, though with different words, “You have not measured up to your Image that I have fashioned. You have violated my trust in your image. Now I am justified as question your character because you have failed my image.” This image fashioning can easily be employed to tear a person down. You can set up an impossible-to-achieve image of a person, then compare them to it, and then discredit them based on that comparison. It is easily swallowed because the ideal is what everyone would want.

Both of these are so destructive. When we look upon people as imperfect-but-loved, there is such a higher chance for healing and growth. This is the attitude that God has with us. It gives us the freedom to screw up royally (when compared to the ideal), yet it never costs us the privilege to re-connect. No, we cannot expect other people to have this Agape-level love for us. So why do we allow them to be the source/cause of the weather we carry around with us. We can never find abiding peace when you are looking to another person.

So, I propose that I/you lay down the Metaphysical Idols I/you have created. Whether you believe in the big-g God or not, these Idols can do nothing for you - except defile (vs 15) your life with expectations that can never be met. There are far better things to worship than these!

Let’s DE-Idol-ize our lives

Who are we Are we the people that we see when we are ashamed of something we did? or are we something more? Are we the people we project with all our justifications?

Can we even "first know ourselves?"

Are you wearing a mask? Maybe we will only know when it is ripped off. 

What we worship...

What we worship...

(this will be changed when I wake up and think, what the heck was I trying to write. For anyone interested, this is what the first draft of a post usually looks like.)

So, idols.... What is an Idol?
(Incomplete answers) people or things or Ideals that take up an inordinate and unhealthy amount our thoughts and time.

Worship – dwelling on, giving time to, holding up as exalted. Acknowledgement of value and position with Words and deeds.

What Idols are you worshiping?

I am having to rethink what my life has been based upon. What ideal has it actually been focused around. What pervasive plan did I pay attention to? Did I worship it? Did it become the idol of my life?

I say yes. But it wasn’t just women. It was the pursuit of an ideal woman to complete me. Too much became watered down due to this pursuit.

So, now, I must lay down forever these and attend to the creator, for whom I was created. (spooky sounding- must be a better way to communicate it.)

Looking for some feedback – This thoughts are very new and very rough.